Ballynafae Information for Visitors

Ballynafae is a scenic island slightly northwest of Ireland. Due to our intense sense of privacy and a regular state of anarchy, our country rarely appears on international maps.

Geography

Ballynafae measures approximately 120 miles by 200 miles. The northern portion is favored with year-round snowcapped mountains and lush, green valleys. Winter sports proliferate here, with hiking and hang gliding favored in the warmer months. The northern coastline is generally rocky with spectacular cliffs for diving.

Our southern shores feature magnificent beaches. To the west, the sand is black and sparkling, similar to some Pacific Island beaches. The southernmost coastline offers pink sand reminiscent of Bermuda and some Caribbean shores. The eastern side of Ballynafae, nearest Ireland, offers pristine iridescent white sands dotted with wild daisies, pink roses, and baby's breath.

State flowers

Our state flowers are the daisy, rose, hyacinth, and violet, for the sake of keeping up appearances. In that spirit, we remind you that in Ballynafae the word bouquet is spelled "bucket."

Climate and tourism

In southern Ballynafae, winter temperatures rarely drop below freezing during daytime hours, and summers are a balmy 80 degrees F, on average. The terrain varies from the level plains of the southern coast, favored by bicycle tours, to the rolling hills as you approach the northern half of the island. Ballynafae is justly famous for its walking tours.

Similar to Ireland, you will find few Roman ruins in Ballynafae, but many stone circles, and medieval castles still owned and maintained by the descendants of the families that built them. Several of these castles are open for tours; check with your hotel's Welcome Centre upon arrival for hours and fees.

Transportation and tourism - by region

The largest city in Ballynafae is Ballynafae City. This city is in the southeastern portion of the island, and travel is permitted by foot, bicycle, and electric taxi.

A comprehensive underground rail system serves the entire island, including a network beneath Ballynafae City, for business travel. An electric coach system supplements horse-and-carriage transport for touring the island.

In northern Ballynafae, most villages are equal in size, beauty, and importance, but tourists often favor a weekend in Dibley where the ice cream parlours are internationally famous and the Sunday sermon by the Vicar is always inspiring.

Holidays and festivals, 2002

There is at least one holiday each month in Ballynafae, including the Pagan quarters and cross-quarters. Imbolc is one of our largest celebrations each year, followed by Mardi Gras later in February.

In March, paved roads are painted green to honor St. Patrick. Green beer is imported from America for the event. All Catholic Church services will be in Gaeilge.

April features Ostara and Easter, with May bringing us Beltane and Cinco de Mayo.

Keeping the aforementioned anarchists in mind, we have scheduled no official holidays past July 4th, and warn visitors that holidays may be cancelled, added, or moved according to whim and without notice. Check with the Welcome Centre for festival schedules, upon arrival in Ballynafae.

Immigration and Communications

Visas are recommended but not required for travel in Ballynafae. There is no customs office entering or leaving Ballynafae, but--in keeping with our anarchy--independent offices sometimes set up shop at the Port of Ballynafae and our airport, for tourists wishing specialized visa and passport stamps.

Standard immunizations often put tourists' minds at rest, but we can assure you that Ballynafae is generally free of contagious diseases. Should "tourists' distress" occur, we have a full staff of witch doctors, healers, clinics, and (generally empty) hospitals which should meet the most rigorous standards of rabid hypochondriacs.

Communications in Ballynafae include twice-daily delivery of mail, free Internet terminals where other countries have phone booths, and free cellular phone use. Please pick up your complimentary phone upon arrival, at any Welcome Centre office. Reminder: Ballynafae law prohibits use of the phone while on a bicycle.

Other questions

If you have any other travel or immigration concerns, please contact our office for prompt response, except in times of general strike and festivals. You can email us at welcome@ballynafae.com